Identity and God: Finding Your True Self in a Confused World

While society often promotes the idea that we can freely change our identity as a social stance, this perspective ignores the obligations we have—to ourselves, to others, and to God—and often overlooks the privilege that allows some to navigate identity without consequence. There is danger for those who navigate their identity freely without guidance. Decisions based solely on trauma, ego, self-interest, or manipulation can lead to confusion, harm, and even become a tool for criminal intent.

Look to the animal kingdom as a reference: there are males and females, with rare exceptions, but the majority follow this natural order. Humans, however, are made in the image of God—set apart from the animal kingdom. We possess intelligence unmatched and morals deeply ingrained. Yet when we let our emotions dominate, our flesh can override our spiritual instincts, allowing ego to take control and constantly seek validation for our sense of significance.

God has already given us guidance so we don’t allow our flesh to control

Genesis 1:27 – “So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.”

• Altering yourself to look less human or striving to become something other than what God created is a form of disrespect to His design.

Jeremiah 1:5 – “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you…”

• A perfect reminder that you were created exactly as intended. God does not make mistakes.

Psalm 139:14 – “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made…”

• Reinforces that your body, identity, and being are precisely how God designed you.

Matthew 19:4-6 – Jesus refers back to creation: “Haven’t you read… ‘He who created them at the beginning made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’?”

• Reestablishes that God created only male and female and designed them for unity and purpose.

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Science Perspective on Male and Female

Science based

From a biological standpoint, humans are classified into two primary sexes: male and female. This distinction is based on chromosomal patterns, reproductive organs, and the roles they play in procreation.

• Chromosomes: Humans have 46 chromosomes, including one pair of sex chromosomes. Females typically have XX, and males XY. These chromosomal differences guide the development of sexual characteristics.

• Reproductive Biology: Male and female reproductive systems are uniquely designed for the continuation of the species. While there are rare intersex variations, the vast majority of humans fall clearly into one of these two categories.

• Hormonal Differences: Sex hormones like estrogen and testosterone influence not only reproduction but also secondary sexual characteristics, metabolism, and certain behaviors. These systems are intricately designed and generally function within the male/female framework.

Science recognizes anomalies, but statistically and functionally, human biology demonstrates that male and female are the natural design for our species. These scientific observations align with scripture, emphasizing that our bodies and identities were created with intentionality and purpose.

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The real question is whether you accept these truths. Many who strongly identify with a constructed sense of self are, in essence, distancing themselves from humanity and, in doing so, rejecting God. Often, these choices stem from unhealed trauma or from allowing the flesh to dominate, leading to a delusional reality where they seek solace in their own understanding rather than rooting themselves in something greater. Instead of allowing life—both its blessings and challenges—to shape them into the best version of themselves, they pursue paths that satisfy immediate desires or personal comfort.

God’s desire is simple: for us to choose Him. Yet, some may question His character because of the demands of sacrifice or the acts of judgment described in scripture. It is crucial to understand the context: in the Old Testament, God was guiding His people in nation-building, purifying lands, and establishing order. Sacrifices were intended to atone for sin (see my blog on sin), while judgments and killings were part of a broader historical narrative—often too harsh for modern sensibilities but critical in shaping the journey of nations and peoples. Without this context, it is easy to misunderstand His actions and intentions.

Identity struggles often begin with unresolved trauma. When a person experiences emotional wounds—whether from neglect, abuse, or societal pressures—they may unconsciously seek to redefine themselves as assert control over one’s life. The ego seeks significance, often craving validation or reassurance that one is special or independent from divine guidance.

True self-worth, however, is not rooted in the approval of the world, nor in shaping our identity to satisfy the flesh—it is rooted in God. Spiritual obedience does not mean suppressing individuality; it means aligning our choices and sense of self with His design, allowing our experiences, trials, and relationships to refine us rather than distort us. When we surrender to God’s guidance, trauma becomes a teacher rather than a dictator, and our ego is tempered by faith.

Scripture reinforces this principle:

• Proverbs 3:5-6 – “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.”

  • True identity emerges when we trust God rather than our own perceptions or impulses.

  
  

• Romans 12:2 – “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”

  • Transformation occurs when we let God shape our sense of self, not trauma, ego, or societal trends.

By viewing identity through the lens of spiritual obedience, we move from self-centered reaction to purposeful alignment. Our experiences, including the pain from trauma, are no longer tools for rebellion—they become stepping stones toward wholeness. Spiritual obedience allows us to reclaim our true selves, rooted in God’s design, while still navigating life with our unique personalities and gifts.

Which road will you take?

In conclusion: Whether you choose to confront your true self or continue living in a constructed reality is entirely your decision. Life does not bend to our illusions, and avoiding the root issues only prolongs struggle. The healthiest path is to face your traumas—through therapy, spiritual guidance, or other healing practices—rather than diving deeper into a fantasy that temporarily masks the real challenges. True growth and freedom come from facing the truth with courage and faith.